[子爵Times]第十五期 A stormy night

A stormy night in Hong Kong. A young man who asked his girlfriend out on a date canceled the date and stayed at home because of the bad weather. Meanwhile, in the same apartment building, a pregnant lady who was lying in bed already, suddenly decided to drive out to grab some food. As she was driving back in the heavy rain, the lightning struck her building. And she saw the whole building collapsing in front of her in the storm. All the residents of that building, including the young man, lost their lives in that accident. Yet the pregnant lady survived. This is a story of fate by author, Kuang Ni from Hong Kong. Dead or alive, all depended on that one thought. Is this a made-up story, or a true reflection of our lives? You have probably also experienced how one decision potentially leads to a dramatic and different result. So is it accidental, or inevitable? Does destiny exist? If so, how is it formed? Can it be changed? How do we change it? My dad published a book titled Enlightenment in 2012. It’s a book about Buddhism and its wisdom that may help you in life. I say “A life-changing book” here because first of all, it is what the Chinese characters on the cover mean; secondly it is my own father’s book and of course I want to sell it; but thirdly, it indeed is “A life-changing book.” Ever since he published book, he has wanted me to translate his book when I grow more proficient in English. I doubt that I have the ability to translate his book yet, but I’d like to take this opportunity to share some bits and parts of his insights on Buddhism; especially those on Zen Buddhism that have helped me in my life. This speech will partially be a rough translation of the first chapter of his book, as he wishes, and partially my personal experience with Zen. Since the day we’re born, we’ve stepped into a huge maze with only one exit. The exit leads to the tranquil middle path that Buddhism is looking for. And only by finding the right road can we exit the maze that is full of suffering. Different thing shappen to different people in our lives, but you should know that every hardship or impasse you face comes from the seeds of your past ignorance and presumptuous acts. There’s nothing we could do with things that already happened, but that doesn’t mean we have to stop searching for the way out. In fact, according to Buddhist teaching, if we wake up from the ignorance, we can definitely leave the maze. There is a kind of dandelion in Canada that can grow out of the ground again even if it’s been pulled out by its roots. Some specialists latter found out that this kind of dandelion has roots that are eight meters down into the earth, and at the end of the roots, there’s a seed. Even if the roots are taken out, the dandelion can grow out again because of its seed. Deep down in our hearts, there’s aseed as well. Without us noticing, the seed has been developing roots, blooming flowers, and even bearing bitter fruits. Although we hate these bitter fruits, we have no idea where they come from. So after trying and failing every time,the fruits remain. They remain because we have only tried to solve the problems on the surface, like taking out the roots of the dandelion but not the seed. The seed that is deep down in our hearts is called “ego,” – the source of all of our troubles and pain. Our hearts should be spacious and open, capable of taking in anything. We are the universe, and the universe is us. We are all one. But when the “ego” starts to develop, we start to separate ourselves from the whole. Then based on our preferences and experience, our hearts start to have limited capacity. Our hearts are no longer big enough to accommodate everything.The more specific preferences we develop, the smaller our hearts become. After a certain time, we start to hang on to the ego and develop different feelings because of it. We experience love and happiness, but also pain and suffering.The ego is a doubled-edged-sword. Is there a way to use it only for good without any bad effects? The ultimate goal is to get rid of the separation between us and the whole. And to do that, Buddhism divides the cultivation of this life style into three steps: Discipline, Meditation, and Wisdom. Our hearts are like candles, swaying in the breeze of desire. Discipline is like adding a glass jar around the candle, separating the breeze so it no longer affects the candle light. Meditation is the process the flame takes to stop swaying. And Wisdom is the growing light as the flame comes to stillness. I’ve been going to boarding schools since I was seven. Once after a stressful week, I went home with a grumpy look. Noticing my anxiousness, my dad asked me to take a walk with him. Along the narrow path were numerous streetlights; some were luminous and some were dusky. He pointed at one tha twas covered in dust and asked me, “Remember your happiest moments? Right now your brightness is covered by the dust of doubts and fears just like this streetlight. But the light is in you, you just need clear the dust off.” I realized that any situation is controllable with the right attitude. That led to my Emotional Flow Chart. The X-axis indicates the date of the week. The Y-axis has a scale of 1-5, one meaning extreme negative emotion and five meaning extreme positive emotion. In the beginning, the lines are shaky like a stock market graph. I noticed that I might have a day of 1 right after a day of5. But as I pay more attention to my feelings, the lines start to get flatter,and tend to settle at 3 and 4. I’m not saying that I’m totally incontrol of my emotion now, but this chart has definitely helped me to be more aware of myself, and thus remain more logical when facing any situation. An easier way to make yourself more aware of your emotional flow without this chart, is talking to yourself. When you’re lying in bed ready to go to sleep, instead of grabbing your phone, consider taking that half an hour, or even just five minutes, to have a conversation with yourself. Ask yourself, “How are you?” and let your subconscious talk to you. Let’s try this. Please close your eyes, and go through everything that happened to you yesterday. How was your day? Where would you mark your day on a scale of 1-5? Obviously the fluctuations of a day’s emotion will be like a heart beat. But try to average out the highs and lows and mark your dot. Did something or someone make you really happy? Did you make someone else’s day better? Was there a time when you could have been more kind? Or was there a time you lost control? And what caused your emotional flows? What do you want your day to be like today? I hope this mini meditation helps you recollect yourself on the anxious last day of school before break. ow I’ll leave you with a formula– 1 *(past) + 2* (now) = variable (future) You could not change your past circumstances, but by adjusting your present mindset, you have the capacity to dramatically alter your future.