第200期：别让专业束缚你的人生

想成为我们的主播，欢迎加微信 xdfbook 投稿。 一段美文，一首英文歌，或是一点生活感想，全由你做主。 《别让专业束缚你的人生》 What Happens When Your Degree and Your Career Aspirations Don’t Line Up? “I have invested years into this. Not just wonderful, easy, ‘my life is so great’ years, but hard, intense, rewarding years. Now, the next natural step is to move forward. After four years, it’s time. But if moving forward is the right thing to do, why do I feel so uneasy? Why do I lie awake at night wondering what else is out there? Why do I look at people who have chosen alternative paths with jealousy? But no! I can’t just throw away everything I’ve worked for in the past four years. Maybe it’s too late. I owe it to myself to make this work1).” If you have ever had this internal dialogue with yourself, you are not alone. For the record2) I am not talking about romantic relationships. I am talking about careers. This article is for those of you who have spent countless years and thousands of dollars to earn higher education degrees, and then feel trapped to work within the confines of said degree. The ones who earn master’s degrees in education, yet decide to become hair stylists or physical trainers. The doctors and psychiatrists3) who dream of moving to Los Angeles to become actors and comedians. The attorneys who long to leave their law firms to write novels. The accountants who want to quit their jobs and open their own bakeries or flower shops. If this is you, lean in. Whether you are in an unhappy romantic relationship, or working in a career that no longer fits your professional desires, you are your own worst enemy. That’s right. I said it. Go look in your mirror and take a long, hard look at yourself. You are standing in the way of your own happiness. You are blocking your own blessings. You are prohibiting yourself from reaching your full potential. It’s 2017! It’s time to get out of your own way. Let’s talk about your concerns. What will people say? Well, who cares. Are you really willing to be unhappy for the next fifty years because of nosey4) Becky and jealous Bob? Becky and Bob will go on to live their own miserable lives, not thinking about you, while you live yours trying to please them. The people who truly love you will support your decision. Take Becky and Bob out of the equation. Now that they are gone, let’s talk about your wasted time. Imagine that I really was talking about a romantic relationship in the first paragraph. What if your best friend who was no longer in love with his or her boyfriend/girlfriend, told you that he or she was getting married, because they did not want the past four years of their relationship to go to waste. If you are a good friend, you may tell your best friend that they did not waste their time. More than likely5), they’ve grown and learned valuable life lessons that they can use moving forward. They probably have a better idea of what they like, and what they don’t like. You may tell them that in the grand scheme6) of life, four years in a relationship is not enough time to justify7) an eternity of unhappiness. Now, look in the mirror and give yourself the same advice. Say, “Hey self, you have learned a lot! You have so many valuable, transferable skills.” Think about buzz words like, “leadership skills,” “critical thinking,” and “project management.” Next we’ll address the most pressing and complicated concern—money. I do not intend to downplay8) financial limitations. I am right there with you. After earning my Bachelor of Arts and Juris Doctorate degrees, I owe the government over $200,000 in student loans (I am not kidding). Some of you may owe much less, and sadly, I know some of you owe much more. Some days I am paralyzed9) by the fear of being in debt for the rest of my life. Those days are not good days. Today is not one of those days. Today, I have perspective. No matter what your religious beliefs are, one thing remains true. You cannot take your money with you to your grave. You can spend it, save it, and leave it behind for loved ones, but once you’re gone, it no longer belongs to you. With this attitude in mind, I began to think about my life. Is $200,000 worth a lifetime of unhappiness? Can you put a price tag on the quality of your life? Sure, my future children would love it if I could pass down boatloads of money, but how wonderful would it be to pass down lessons in persistence, faith, and hard work instead? Maybe you are still unconvinced. Maybe you are still afraid to take a leap of faith10) and step into the unknown. Maybe you are afraid to leave behind the comfort and stability of your current lifestyle. Maybe you feel inadequate. If that’s you, take another look in the mirror and try to see the potential that lives inside of you. You are powerful beyond measure. The most common way people give up their power is by believing they do not have any. I am a firm believer that we are the most successful at what we do when we are passionate about what we’re doing. We are all born with talents, gifts, and inexplicable11) passions. If you are searching for meaning and purpose in your career, don’t start with your degrees and your qualifications, start with your passions. Fifty years from now, make sure you can say you chose your life, you didn’t settle for12) it. The choice is yours, my friend. Choose wisely, and get out of your own way. “我把这几年都投入到了这上面。这些年并不精彩，也不容易，从没觉得“生活棒极了”。然而，这些年是艰辛、紧张、很有收获的。如今，下一步自然是向前走。四年过去了，该向前走了。可是如果向前走是正确之选，为什么我会感到如此不安呢？为什么晚上我夜不能寐，想知道还有什么别的选择呢？为什么我看到那些选择其他道路的人会心怀嫉妒呢？不！我不能把过去四年我为之努力奋斗的一切全部丢掉。现在这么做也许为时已晚。我必须所学为所用。” 如果你曾与自己有过这样的内心对话，那这样做的并不只有你一个人。郑重声明，我说的不是恋爱关系，我说的是事业。这篇文章针对的是那些耗费了数年，花费了数千美元才获得高等教育学位，却又觉得限于所获学位去找工作倍感束缚的人。这些人包括获得了教育硕士学位却决心成为发型师或体能教练的人，梦想搬到洛杉矶成为演员的医生和精神病学家们，那些渴望离开律师事务所去写小说的律师们，想辞掉工作去开面包店或花店的会计师们。如果你也有这样的想法，那就去干吧 。 不管你是正谈着恋爱但并不开心，还是你有一份事业但并不符合自己的职业预期，你都是自己最大的敌人。没错，我就是这么说的。去照照镜子，睁大眼睛好好看看自己。你阻碍了自己的幸福。你挡住了自己的福运。你正在阻止自己发挥全部的潜能。都2017年了！是时候了，别再挡着自己了。 让我们来聊聊你的担忧。人们会怎么说?哎，谁会在乎啊。你真的愿意因为爱管闲事的张三和心怀嫉妒的李四，在未来50年里一直闷闷不乐?张三和李四将继续过他们自己痛苦的生活，不会想到你，而你却为了取悦他们而过着同样痛苦的生活。真正爱你的人会支持你的决定。不要理会张三和李四。 既然不谈他们，那我们就来聊聊你浪费掉的时间。假设我在第一段中说的真是恋爱关系。如果你最好的朋友告诉你，他/她不再爱自己的女朋友或男朋友了，但却准备与对方结婚了，因为他们不想浪费过去四年相处的时光，你会怎么说？ 如果你是个靠谱的朋友，你会告诉你最好的朋友，他们没有浪费时间。很有可能是他们更成熟了，获得了宝贵的人生教训，在以后的人生路上可以用上。他们可能更清楚自己喜欢什么，不喜欢什么。你会告诉他们，在整个人生历程中，四年的恋爱时间并不算长，不足以为之一辈子不开心。现在，照照镜子，给自己同样的建议，对自己说：“嘿，自己，你学到了很多！你掌握了很多有价值的通用技能。”想一想“领导力”“批判性思维”和“项目管理”之类的流行语。 接下来我们说一说最迫切而且复杂的担忧——金钱。我并不想说经济状况受限就无所谓。在这方面我和你们一样。我获得文学学士和法学博士学位后，欠了政府超过20万美元的学生贷款（我不是开玩笑）。你们中的一些人可能欠得少一些，而可悲的是，我知道你们有些人欠得更多。有段日子里，我因害怕余生在欠债中度过而不知所措。那日子不好过。今天不一样。 今天，我明白了。无论你的宗教信仰是什么，有一点永远是真的——你不能把金钱带到坟墓里。你可以把钱花掉，或是存起来，或是留给所爱的人，但是一旦你过世，钱就不再属于你。抱着这种态度，我开始思考人生。你值不值得为20万美元一辈子不高兴？你能给生活质量贴个价签吗？当然，如果我能遗留下大量金钱，我未来的孩子们可能会喜欢，不过如果我可以传承坚持、信念和努力工作的教义，不也很美妙么？ 也许你仍然不相信我的话。也许你仍然害怕充满信心地迈向未知。也许你放不下当前舒适而稳定的生活。也许你觉得自己能力不够。如果那样的话，再照照镜子，努力发现存在于你生命里的潜力。你拥有无可估量的力量。人们放弃自身力量最常见的方式就是觉得自己没有任何力量。 我坚信，只要我们对我们正在做的事情充满热情，我们就会把事情做得非常成功。才能、天赋和无法解释的热情与生俱来。如果你正在探寻职业生涯的意义和目的，不要从你的学位和各种证书开始，而是要从你的热情开始。确保50年后你可以说自己选择了人生，没有得过且过。我的朋友，选择得由你自己做出。做出聪明的选择，不要挡着自己的幸福。 文章摘自：《新东方英语》杂志2017年3月号